Here you are dating this girl or about to date a girl; she seems perfect, nice, caring and juts wonderful. In fact your relationship seems really good. However, how do you know she’s the right girl for you? Are you sure she’s the person you want to spend your forever with? The person you want to give all your attention and love…are you sure it’s her? This may seem like a difficult question to answer but we’ve made it easier for you. All you need to do is focus on the important details and think through your situation. If your girl is not doing or is any of these things we’re listing here for you, then you may have to think about something even bigger.
Your girl is kind. This is a very important quality to look for in a babe. She may have a sassy attitude but if she doesn’t care about your feelings or the feelings of others, especially people that do menial jobs (like cleaners, etc), then she may not be right for you. You both won’t be able to sustain a healthy relationship for long. She is also fair in your relationship. This means she thinks about your well-being and even offers to split bills and chores with you. She even pays both your bills without being asked.
She works hard. Trust us, you need and want to be with someone who’s willing to work for what she wants in life. When a person works hard, it means she will be stable and can fend for herself financially when no one else is around. Does your girl expect you to buy every single thing for her instead of getting off her butt to work? However, this doesn’t mean you shouldn’t get her presents on birthdays and anniversaries and stuff like that.She has good values and priorities. A girl with good values and priorities is very important in a relationship. If her values and priorities don’t match with yours, then you need to start thinking if she’s really right for you. Good values may be honesty, trustworthiness, and integrity, not being judgmental or always criticizing everything anyone does. Even if her values and priorities don’t match the traditionally accepted standards, do they match yours?
Does she accept you or trusts you for who you are or is she always trying to change you? If she constantly seeks to change everything about you (and I mean everything including what you look like), you definitely deserve better and she is probably not the one for you.
She creates an environment of trust. Not one of judgment. Do you feel like you’re in a place where you can be honest when you’re with her? Do you feel like you can be yourself around her? Or do you feel like you can cry, be hyperactive or even really awkward with her and she doesn’t put you down? Can you do all things you can’t do in front of other people easily when you’re with her? Does she comfort or encourage you when you’re feeling down? Does she try to help you even when she doesn’t agree with what you say? If she does, then she’s right for you.
She makes you feel good about yourself. I know some people like to be with someone who makes them feel bad or angry or even excited wrongly at times but this isn’t cool if you want a long-lasting relationship. How your girl makes you feel is very important in your relationship. If she doesn’t make you happy, or better about yourself or life in general when you’re with her, she may not be right for you. The right girl for you shouldn’t make you feel worried or anxious or bad all the time. She shouldn’t make you feel like you’re doing or saying the wrong things all the time. You should feel confident and happy and good when you’re with her.
If you sign up for a relationship where she makes you feel wrong all the time, then you’re setting yourself up for long-term trouble.
She makes you a better person. You should be in a relationship with someone who makes you a better person. If she makes you feel or behave worse than before you met her, then she’s probably not right for you. If she makes you better than you were before, then think about it- she may just be the one for you.
By the way, does she encourage you to achieve your dreams or to improve yourself and your life? Does she make you want to build a better future for you or make you want to work harder than before? Man, you’ve hit the jackpot. You definitely don’t want to let her go.
She puts as much effort as you do into the relationship. So, here’s the deal with good relationships- the guy and the girl should be willing to invest equal time, effort, and everything else in making the relationship as awesome as possible. If your girl wants you to do everything but she isn’t really helping out, then it’s not a good thing. But if she makes the effort to do stuff for you both- like planning dates once in a while or surprising you with something cool once in a while, then she’s a keeper. It shows that things can really work out between you both.
But, it doesn’t mean she’s got to be super-active in your relationship. If you’re both the relaxed-let’s-take-things-gently types, then it’s cool. It just means you both have to come up with everything. It’s just important that you guys have the same needs and attitudes.
She appreciates you…and stuff you do. No guy should be with someone who takes them for granted. So, you need to pay attention to how (that’s if) she thanks you or shows gratitude (one way or the other) when you do nice stuff for her. You should also check if she does something nice for you too (on occasion)- it may help you know how much she cares about you. It doesn’t matter if what you guys do for each other is small. It’s the thought that counts. Not everyone has the money or the time to do big stuff.
She’s willing to share responsibility. We know men are “men of the house” and stuff like that but you need a girl who’s fair, willing to work hard and is honest. You both need to share responsibility in chores, finances, and other stuff but not equally.
She balances you out. It is important to have common interests, values, and priorities. You both need to think or act similar in certain ways. But, it’s good to be different in certain ways too. This will allow both of you to contribute to the relationship equally just by being yourselves. Make sure she balances you out.
She fights fair. It’s normal to have fights in relationships. It’s said by relationship gurus to be a sign of a healthy relationship. But if you get into a fight with her and she insults you or goes for the low blow…dude, you need to start rethinking your relationship. It is a serious sign of disrespect to do that to a man or woman. Trust us, you want someone who fights with you in a fair way. You don’t want someone who blackmails you into getting what she wants. Look for someone who’s the exact opposite.
She shares your interests. OK guys, you need someone whom you can have a conversation with or even do activities with so that you can spend quality time together. Make sure your girl has similar interests with you- it will help avoid problems in the future. You can also build up common interests over time by trying new hobbies together or learning a language.
She shares your values and priorities. Your girl should share your values and priorities- it makes you assured that she’s right for you. Having the same values and priorities will help prevent tension and conflict as you both continue together. While your values and hers may not be the traditional type, at least let your values define your relationship. But, even if you do have different values and priorities, you both can still find a common ground that will make you respect each other more.
She has similar goals. You both should have similar goals in life, especially if you’re seeing your “till death do us part” in her. Your goals should match up even if there are differences. This is because your goals will determine the kind of path you both tread on. If something is important to her but it’s not important to you it may cause challenges later on.
She understands your friends…and has good friends herself. While you both may be the main cast in your relationship, there’s always the supporting cast. The truth is our relationships with other people influence our romantic relationships. You both must respect and be able to co-exist with the other’s friends and have good friends too. Don’t let your friends get in the way of your relationship but you should talk about it when you’re having problems with each other’s friends.
She has similar experiences…and background. While experts say this isn’t really required for a happy relationship, it is a major bonus. People who grow up in similar environments or have done or gone through similar experiences have more to bond over, think in similar ways and even understand each other better. Certain things will be easier in your relationship if your girl’s life is almost like yours is.
So here they are. The ways you can know if a girl is right for you. Please like, leave a comment or share if this helps to clarify things. Wish you a great relationship!